Plush Because

O hai!

Iz Irwin. I r kitteh. I livez with teh hoomans, Jim n Amber, n also Addy, Pingu, Phil, and Gwack. Dey r teh bestest!1

U may hav red Pingu talkin bout teh “werx” n hao Jim doesn’t go dere no moarz. Well, i gess he n “werx” madez up or someting, cuz he were gone awl day. Amber awlso gotz jobz tooday. Iz not suer hao too feelz — sads cuz teh hoomanz gone, or happiez cuz dey makes moneys? Mebbe dey brings home moar cheezburgers. Wuld be niec.

Every now and again, my master Jim has flights of fancy when it comes to food. Today, he made this really good meatloaf! He tells me it was made with beef, pork, and veal — three of the major food groups. Spiced it up with… I didn’t pay attention, really. The meat is the best part. I guess he forgot the eggs or something, because it fell apart a little bit on the plate, but it all goes to the same place, so no big deal. I got all the invisible parts — it was delicious! He needs to make delicious food like that more often.

I don’t think I mentioned earlier, but Amber and Jim told me they were going to get me a special invisible burger next time they’re out for hamburgers. I guess they don’t go out for hamburgers very often, because I haven’t gotten one yet, but I’ll be patient — this one is worth the wait. They called it the Addy-Burger, and it goes like this: Three patties, one each of ground beef, turkey, and venison; top with American and Monterey Jack cheese, bacon, ham, and a fried egg on top! Does it get any better? I’d probably have to eat it in three or four sittings, though. No matter; Pingu has a fridge and a chainsaw for portion control, so we’re good.

After much begging and pleading, from both myself and from Jim, I finally get to post. We’re all quickly learning that letting Amber be the only one with the password was a bad idea. Mostly because she forgets about her other websites on a regular basis. Silly Amber.

I, as you might have guessed by the handsome picture of me at the top of this post, am Pingu. I’m one of the favorites, if I do say so myself. I even got to stay with Amber when she was in the big scary hospital room. I did regular check ups on her and everything. It was worth it, too, because in the end she got better, and I got plenty of fish wine.

For those of you who are curious, I’m named after the claymation penguin Pingu. That’s actually why I was lucky enough to come home with Amber and Jim: because I looked so much like him that Amber just “had” to have me.

Amber has been positively lazy with this site lately. Part of it is to be blamed on the place where Jim used to go every morning for this thing called “work.” They told him to stop coming in, and he felt very bad about it, so she’s been taking care of him, and I and Addy have been helping her. Phil’s been trying to suck the fail out of the situation, but I’m pretty sure he could never suck all the fail out of the place where Jim “worked.” Seems that place would do far better if it had penguin plushes running it. We know how to do things right.

It may seem short, but I have a chilled bottle of fish wine and a good book waiting for me. Good night all, and tell Amber to start letting us write more often. It is OUR site, after all.

Amber’s just now getting over some huge bug or something that she had for about a week. I was so worried about her that I kept constant vigilance over her. But my worry was nothing compared to her boyfriend Jim’s worry. I’ve been trying my hardest to help him feel better, as well, but that’s very slow-going. I do hope my efforts fare well in the end. I would hate if he worried himself sick. I just finished making Amber feel better!

One thing that’s really making Amber feel bad, though this time mentally, is the fact that, even though she was so very nice to us and gave us this website, she has no idea how to fix it and make it work properly. I’d help, save the fact that I know even less than she does, and I don’t have fingers anyway. She’s trying to fix the situation by asking her friends for help. They know how to work things like this, and won’t laugh at her much about being incompetent at websites.

To our very odd world. My name is Phil, and as you may have noticed, I’m a pug. That means I’m made of fail. But that is beside the point. I am here to welcome you to Plush Because, our new blog. I say “our”, because I will be sharing this blog (and the adventures contained within) with my fellow plushies. Currently, it’s the five of us (myself, Addy, Pingu, Gwack, and Irwin the resident LolCat). From time to time, others will stop by. Some may stay permanently, others not so much. But you will meet them as the time comes.

Life is interesting as a fail pug, and is made much more interesting by living with Amber and Jim. With my view from atop the computer screen, there are very few dull moments. But you will learn of all that later. For now, Amber desperately needs to take a nap, and I must force her to do so, because Jim’s forcing did not help nearly enough.